Sorry about the lack of replies right now – am going to be going over my quite large backlogs and life right now be taking over so much of my time.
So I got two questions the other day which you can read below.
Hi! My question is: after a death, how long would a mourner wait to read the deceased’s will? Would it be totally taboo – or even not allowed – for the next of kin to ask to see if the day after death? Many thanks 🙂
Sorry, another question – I read that flowers weren’t a done thing at Jewish funerals, but would a Synagogue make an exception if the deceased, was, say, in a relationship with someone non-Jewish, who wanted to have flowers? Thankyou!
To answer the first bit about the will – It might just be me but I never heard or read anything that says you can’t read the will a day after a death. I did try to look up from a few different sources but I couldn’t find anything. I could be wrong but I can’t find anything to say otherwise.
Regarding the flowers, you are correct there. There is a couple of reasons why we don’t place flowers and its mostly down to everyone being equal, flowers die and not a good way to remember someone and that its better usage elsewhere for the money you spend on the flowers.
What I mean by this is it’s better to give the money you were going to spend on flowers over to a charity in the memory of the one that has passed away. It will help other people and have a far more long impact and after you done that take a simple stone and place it on the grave to show someone still remembers.
Regarding the actual question would they allow it? This is a harsh “maybe” but it might be seen as disrespectable or even just removed outright.
I’m going to toss out a link to Chabad about what you can expect on the day: https://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/2699548/jewish/What-to-Expect-at-a-Jewish-Funeral.htm
A couple of days ago I got the following question (sorry for the late answering for these, got a whole back log!).
I have a question, when attending a Jewish burial would one have to remove there piercings? Only asking as if I get one I would not be able to remove it until it heals completely which could take months to even two years. Jewidism is a important part of me even if I don’t show it much, I would rather have a piercing then a tattoo as they can be removed if needed even though I do think of getting a tattoo at times.
Example snake bites.
Thank you for taking you time to answer this question.
Techinally from my understanding (and quite a few other Rabbis), piercings themselves is not against Jewish law and thus you could have them. However answering your question I would remove them as a sign of respect. As you have said about a burial, I am assuming you may be attending one soon and if so – why not just wait until afterwards and then get your piercings.
In other words, I would not worry too much about it but if you can remove them in such a event. Ultimately people are not going to be bothering over what you look like but for the mouring of the dead.